The Weight of Death

Some people say that dreams are just random synapses firing while you sleep. Other people say that dreams are just the events of the day replaying in your mind. Still others believe that dreams are some sort of magic. I believe something in between all of that. I've always had very vivid, and often disturbing dreams. Sometimes I have really great dreams, but few dreams really make me feel like something bigger than myself is involved. I had one of those "bigger than me" dreams the other night.

In the dream I was dead, but I didn't know it, and was trying to keep living. I was invisible to everyone but my mother, and I couldn't understand why no one was talking to me when we went out places. My mother explained to me that I was dead, and a ghost, and no one but she could see me. I couldn't believe her, I kept saying she was lying to me. It finally hit home that I must really be dead, when she took me to see Hubby and he couldn't see me. At one point in the dream a man saw me and ran after me shouting some other woman's name. My mother explained to me that sometimes when someone is grieving intensely they'll see a ghost, and imagine it is their lost loved in, even if it really isn't. This dream made me feel heavy, and some kind of spiritual after I woke up. It made me wonder about its meaning, which doesn't usually happen. I still feel a heavy weight on my heart whenever I think about it...