Procrastination and Holiday Weirdness

I don't know why I'm doing this. I have a big final tomorrow. I should have spent the day studying, but instead I did a million other things. I should be studying now but I can't seem to make myself. Now I'm going to be up all night and probably not well prepared, then I'll hate myself tomorrow. Why am I doing this?

I talked to my sister today. My folks are flying to the west coast to spend Christmas with her. I feel slightly jealous. I have not spent a Christmas without my parents...ever. I don't want to be forced to spend my favorite holiday with my in-laws. I like them but I'm not really comfortable with them, and now I have to spend the biggest holiday of the year in a weird and uncomfortable place. I know it'll probably make me sad and miss my parents more.

If you knew me, you'd know how big of a deal Christmas and my family is to me. I'd feel better if I knew that Hubby and I would spend the day together as our own little family, but that won't happen. We'll end up at the in-laws for a very long time. As the hours pass I'll feel increasingly uncomfortable and bored, and finally I'll end up fighting sleep as the 6th or 7th hour ticks by. Can you tell I've experienced this before?

I guess I should think positively about it. No use in creating a self-fulfilling prophecy. Maybe it'll be better this year, or maybe we won't spend so much time there this year. Maybe spending the holiday with the in-laws will increase the comfortable-ness barrier. (Never mind the fact that they are amazingly out of touch with the modern world). Either way, I do not begrudge my sister her time with my parents. I know it means a lot to her to have them come to her instead of she and Her Hubby having to fly here. I'm really happy that she gets to have one last big family Christmas on the west coast before she and Her Hubby move a few states over. I suppose it's about time I became a grown-up and experienced a holiday without Mom and Dad. I didn't see them on Thanksgiving, I can live without Christmas too. (Which I guess, is precisely what is bothering me).

P.S. Because my posts have had a lack of pictures I wil begin adding random pictures from my computer. The one in this post is a cell phone picture of a beautiful sunset I saw when I took the puppy out.