adorable little red-heads

I have come to a fairly important and surprising conlcusion today. I may change my mind later on, but right now this is what I want. After reading an article about parental readiness I have concluded that: I'm 80% positive I don't want kids. I love them, they're so fun and cute, but they're a totally huge responsibility. I'm going to be a teacher; I'll be around kids all day, every day. I'm an aunt, and will be again soon, I'm sure. I married young and still have a whole lot of things I want to do before I have to give up my life to my children. I don't want to give up traveling, quiet me time, alone time with Hubby, post-grad degrees, and just for fun enrichment classes. I'm afraid by the time I do everything I want it may be too late.

Hubby is a bit older than me. If we did have kids on the timeline we've thought of, he'd be at least 30 by the time we had our first. That idea doesn't sit well with him. Sometimes I feel bad that I'm not his age. If he had married someone his age, she'd be in the same place as him professionally and financially, and they probably would have been married sooner and had a kid by now. Hubby says he's not sure if he wants children, but I'm pretty sure somewhere in the back of his mind he really does. The funny thing is that he's the one who introduced me to the idea of not having kids. I just assumed we would, I thought it was what you were supposed to do about 2 years after marriage. I'm seeing it a little differently now.

The 80% figure is accounting for the fact that I am young, and surely at this age I shouldn't want children anyway. The wiggle room also accounts for the fact that we actually have to do the things I don't want to give up. I don't want to be one of those couples that says, "Oh we're going to travel and spend lots of wonderful times together," when they actually just sit at home and watch TV. I don't want to get to the end of things and never have any fulfilling achievements. I've heard raising children can be very fulfilling.

Maybe in 3 or 4 years I'll feel differently. I don't know, but I do know that I want to be able to enjoy being out of school and having disposable income and free time to enjoy for a while. Hubby and I have never known what having disposable income is like. I've been in school the entire 4 years and he's been supporting us. If we do have children I want to go on a romantic Hawaiian vacation before they come along.