Ass Backwards, but its All Right

I moved out of the house last night. Something happened that made me realize that I don't think I will ever be able to trust Hubby. I confronted him about it and he denied it of course, like he always does, and I doubted him like I always do. We both realized that this is not how a marriage should work. I think that at this point too much has happened and I don't think I can get over the trust issues. I am so very tired of justifying the things he does. I think I deserve better things than what this marriage has held. I deserve to be loved and made feel special. I deserve to be with someone who will do the silliest things with me just because he wants to be around me. I know these things may sound trivial but it is so much bigger than that. I am so freaked out but excited at the same time. I am about to embark on a whole new chapter of my life.

I went looking at apartments today and I think I found a really nice place. It is 820 square feet. It has a washer and dryer in the unit, a fully equipped kitchen, a huge walk in closet, a 4x6 storage area right outside the apartment, vaulted ceilings, a balcony, and all utilities are paid, except electric. The complex has a golf course, a pool, a pond, a gym, and a tanning salon. They would allow me to bring the puppy, which is the best thing ever. The only drawback is that it is 45 minutes away from work. The good part about that is that my chances of running into Hubby at the grocery store or a restaurant are slim to none. I have a few more places to look at over the next few days, but by the end of this week I should be the proud renter of my very first apartment.

Somehow I've ended up doing it backwards. I spent my early 20's married, and now I'm about to spend the rest of my life on my own.