Big Giant Huge Deal

So, the other night J and I were laying in bed talking (where we do all of our serious talking) and broached the topic of the "official move-in," and it is official: I'll be moving into J's place at the end of February. We have been living together on a trial basis for the last 2 months, with me still paying rent for my apartment, but not living there at all. I honestly can't remember the last time I slept in that bed. I have just been blissfully happy about the whole move-in thing, and I still am, but this morning it really hit me.

I.am.moving.in.with.him!

This is a Big Giant Huge Deal. A gal doesn't just go around moving in with any guy she dates. This is real, this is it. I've never moved in with anyone in this way before. When ex hubby and I moved in together we were already engaged and it was kind of a no big deal thing. With J, this is a huge show of commitment. This is the kind of thing where if we break up it's not just ok, I guess I won't be seeing him anymore but rather ok, now I have to pack all my things, find a place to live and move again. The amazing thing is that this idea doesn't scare me in the least. I am actually just so happy and amazed that J wants to commit to me in this way. He's never before lived with a woman, so I feel amazingly special.

I am betting a few years after this will come the next natural step, which will be to get married. J already said that for him, moving in together is a sort of pre-engagement. That makes me happy to hear, because although I've been through one failed marriage, I know what it takes now for a good one, and I know J and I would be great.